Diamonds and Cubic Zirconia's

Historic Health Care Measure
About stinkin time....Although it's not what I wanted for Christmas....
You know, I've been married for a couple o' decades now...And here's my thing...My husband didn't buy me a diamond when we got married. He bought me a Cubic Zirconia.
It was really pretty and ornate. But it was too gawdy for my tastes and not a real diamond.
He had his mother buy the thing which was fine, however, she has different taste than I do and really he could have gotten me a tiny diamond and nice plain band for as much as the big ole Cubic Zirconia.
For years I told him I would love to have a plain band with a nice diamond.
Instead, he bought me diamond pendants. Which are nice....And diamond earrings....Which are equally as nice...And a diamond set in a cat pendant...Which was different but nice and a wedding band with diamond chips all over the thing, which was okay....But not what I asked for. So, why was this such a hard request?
Well, partly because my husband thought that by buying me all these different assortments of diamonds, that A) I would be placated in my request for a plain band and a tiny solitaire (to which he was clueless to what I was talking about) and B) He just thought I wanted diamonds. Which was wrong.
I wanted one.
That's all I wanted.
One diamond ring; a solitaire.
It didn't have to be the size of a paper weight. It just had to be a solitaire. So....
One day we were walking through a department store and I took him over to the counter and said, "That is what I want." (This was in our twenty-fourth year of marriage).
"That's it?" He said incredulously.
"Yeah."
"I would have never picked that for you."
"I know."
"You're sure?"
"Yeah. Pretty sure."
So he had the girl measure my fingers and ring it up and in a few weeks I had my dream wedding set.
It costs approximately, in all likelihood, so much less than the gawdy, fake one.
So what am I getting at? Well, in my estimation this Health Care bill is kind of like all those well-meant diamonds. They are okay, but not what we wanted. And finally when the house and the senate figure out what we really want and how much less it is going to cost everyone in the long run they are going to do the same double take that my husband did.
"That's it?" They said incredulously.
"Yeah."
"I would have never picked that for you."
"I know." And it will cost approximately, in all likelihood, so much less than the gawdy, fake one.


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~Takes a village to raise an objection~


Blessed Merry Christmas and a quietly happy New Year.

Headlines....And get an ecard from the pres...

HEADLINES.....Kinda...

Sheriff's siren can be heard and felt
....And smelled...

Flint woman: ID stolen while serving prison time
....For Cereal? Why?

Moratorium on medical marijuana on hold for now
...Smoke seen rising from Michigan Supreme Court and apparently someone did a run for taco's in the wee hours....
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Shoe Prints Lead to Wexford County Break-in Suspect
<one eyebrow raises>
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http://holiday.barackobama.com/Holiday-2009.aspx?uid=d695a44c-545a-4929-a7ae-8da8a7ac3038&s=Sharon&g=0
We in the Democratic party have nothing better to do with our time....Other than that pesky health care issue and a couple of inconvenient wars and truth's....


....The mind giggles....

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From The Desk of Pete Yates and Michigan Headlines!

FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!!!

Cross dressing, drunk, trespassing, four year olds....Because we truly live in the end times....
http://www.wrcbtv.com/Global/story.asp?S=11689145
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Northern Michigan and Central Michigan Headlines!

If you haven't done it yet, run and do it now because.....
1 day left to comment on Dow Dioxin cleanup

For some people...Cool Runnings needs a sequel....And these people live in Michigan....
Kenyan Olympic speedskaters learn in Michigan

Because people here are bustin wid de Benjamins!
'Missing Kid' Charity scam busted

And because a new one in Michigan is always newsworthy!
New MidMichigan auto dealership

Mid-Michigan doctor seeks out family to help
I should imagine that will not be a hard search around here!
H1N1 recall: Parents don't worry
Because their children have already had it and given it to the entire family so, what's to worry?

______________________________
The Onion

Could be up there with Northern Michigan Headlines!!
Henry Ford Modernizes Production

  Honestly this might be the headline from that era....
Obsessive Freak Abner Doubleday Forces Locals To Play Nonsensical Game
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National News Headline!

Roy Disney has died
Mouse and Eisner brought in for questioning.





Thanks and come again....Try the veal....





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~Takes a village to raise a Bill O'Reilly.~

From The Desk of Pete Yates! And Headlines from Northern Michigan

Don't get between a German and their sausage....
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/germany/6810528/Salami-battle-in-supermarket-leaves-Germans-in-hospital.html

______________
Headlines
Posting a Long Wait at the Post Office
No kidding?

Snow Bringing, Keeping Away Business in Northern Michigan

Underwear wearing, mouse eating cheese backwards....
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YOUR BURGLAR WON'T TELL!

I got this in my email....So I shall share...

THINGS YOUR BURGLAR WON'T TELL YOU:

1. Of course I look familiar. I was here just last week cleaning your carpets, painting your shutters, or delivering your new refrigerator.

2. Hey, thanks for letting me use the bathroom when I was working in your yard last week. While I was in there, I unlatched the back window to make my return a little easier.

3. Love those flowers. That tells me you have taste ... And taste means there are nice things inside. Those yard toys your kids leave out always make me wonder what type of gaming system they have.

4. Yes, I really do look for newspapers piled up on the driveway. And I might leave a pizza flyer in your front door to see how long it takes you to remove it. Keep mail box empty..

5. If it snows while you're out of town, get a neighbor to create car and foot tracks into the house. Virgin drifts in the driveway are a dead giveaway.

6. If decorative glass is part of your front entrance, don't let your alarm company install the control pad where I can see if it's set. That makes it too easy.

7. A good security company alarms the window over the sink. And the windows on the second floor, which often access the master bedroom-and your jewelry. It's not a bad idea to put motion detectors up there too.

8. It's raining, you're fumbling with your umbrella, and you forget to lock your door-understandable. But understand this: I don't take a day off because of bad weather.

9. I always knock first. If you answer, I'll ask for directions somewhere or offer to clean your gutters. (Don't take me up on it.)

10. Do you really think I won't look in your sock drawer? I always check dresser drawers, the bedside table, and the medicine cabinet.

11. Here's a helpful hint: I almost never go into kids' rooms.

12. You're right: I won't have enough time to break into that safe where you keep your valuables. But if it's not bolted down, I'll take it with me.

13. A loud TV or radio can be a better deterrent than the best alarm system. If you're reluctant to leave your TV on while you're out of town, you can buy a $35 device that works on a timer and simulates the flickering glow of a real television. (Find it at faketv.com.)

8 MORE THINGS A BURGLAR WON'T TELL YOU:

1. Sometimes, I carry a clipboard. Sometimes, I dress like a lawn guy and carry a rake.. I do my best to never, ever look like a crook.

2. The two things I hate most: loud dogs and nosy neighbors.

3. I'll break a window to get in, even if it makes a little noise. If your neighbor hears one loud sound, he'll stop what he's doing and wait to hear it again. If he doesn't hear it again, he'll just go back to what he was doing. It's human nature.

4. I'm not complaining, but why would you pay all that money for a fancy alarm system and leave your house without setting it?

5. I love looking in your windows. I'm looking for signs that you're home, and for flat screen TVs or gaming systems I'd like. I'll drive or walk through your neighborhood at night, before you close the blinds, just to pick my targets.

6. Avoid announcing your vacation on your Facebook page. It's easier than you think to look up your address.

7. To you, leaving that window open just a crack during the day is a way to let in a little fresh air. To me, it's an invitation.

8. If you don't answer when I knock, I try the door. Occasionally, I hit the jackpot and walk right in.

Sources: Convicted burglars in North Carolina , Oregon , California , and Kentucky ; security consultant Chris McGoey, who runs crimedoctor.com; and Richard T. Wright, a criminology professor at the University of Missouri-St. Louis, who interviewed 105 burglars for his book Burglars on the Job.

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Snopes!

Want to win an election? Well, it may be determined by foot powder....
http://www.snopes.com/politics/ballot/footpowder.asp

I say chuck um all and put firemen in charge.
http://www.snopes.com/politics/ballot/turnover.asp

Apparently he's angry and not going to take it anymore!
http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/haroldestes.asp

Let's go do it!
http://www.snopes.com/politics/military/letssaythanks.asp

Could have been Coyote ugly....
http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/luckycoyote.asp


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~Takes a village to raise an idiot.~

Some peoples headlines....

TV buy turns into basement holdup
Okay that's just plain odd...
Bay County jail administrator defends his coleslaw
He says his just needed more sugar and mayonnaise....
Local mall will no longer have exotic pet exhibits
After the incident with the crocidile and the mountain lion people take pause...........

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The Onion

New Study Reveals Most Children Unrepentant Sociopaths

I've said that about young children for years....

From The Desk of Pete Yates and Headlines and The Whimsy of Caps!

http://ydr.inyork.com/ci_13946397?source=most_viewed
If you're Amish, this is not something you want to be also....
Boy he's going to have some splainin' to do....
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Sadly, and I mean this with all the love in my heart, sadly, this is not really news around here...
Mid-Michigan car dealer files chapter 11 bankruptcy

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~Takes a village to raise an idiot.~

Jealousy is a useless emotion in human beings....

Joshua Bebow.

I write that name because he a week ago he was a seventeen year old boy going to high school in the town I grew up in.

This week he is in heaven with his savior.

 

I'm told Josh was an amazing kid- smart and popular, blessed from most people's point of view. He had three brothers, his mother and father and a large extended, close-knit family. He was active in school and was a member of a Catholic church in my home town.

Or at least that is what I gathered from what people have told me.

 

A tragic car accident took his life.

 

I personally didn't know Josh. I knew his father because we went to the same high school. We were not friends. But my heart aches for such a loss. Not only because we are both parents but because- I love teenaged children. And my heart breaks for the loss of even one of them.

I cried the other day, over the phone while talking to my mother, about a child I have never met and never would until we are both in heaven.

 

It wasn't the first time.

 

I don't know what it is about teenagers that I enjoy….If it's the whimsy in their step or the completely open minded thoughtfulness of their being….Or if it's the lyrical poetic beauty of a mind at that age? There is something about teenagers that I enjoy being around.

Maybe it's because they are adults with open minds? They have not, for the most part, had the tragedy of life befall them yet and can be blissfully optimistic.

 

This one however, is gone.

And so much more is the loss for the rest of the world.

 

All we can think is that he was such a good person, and such a joy here on Earth, that God in his infinite wisdom, took him so that he could be a shining soul in heaven and amuse The Lord himself.

 

At least I hope that eventually his parents can come to believe that.

 

 

When you are growing up, you think to yourself that you are the only person in the world with the certain problems. Sometimes you wish that you could trade places with someone else, but you don't know what tragedy is in their lives. You don't know what tragedy will be in their lives.

 

When you have a child with Autism, the child that was born to you, dies in your mind. They will never be on the football team, they won't go to the prom or drive a car or be their brother or sisters confidant. And you grieve for them as if they had died. Even though you still have this other child that has taken their place.

Does that sound harsh?

You give birth to someone with perceptions of what they will become. When it is ripped away from you and you know it; it's a death.

 

I remember the first time I had to tell someone that Booga was mentally disabled. I sobbed for hours. It was admitting something I didn't want to believe was true. How could God, who had made me so socially awkward, verbally inept; how could I have been so lucky as to score a disabled child to boot? I remember being in high school and thinking, "If I could only be someone else, somewhere else…." And looking for a way to be someone else, somewhere else….

I was constantly making up some kind of story or some kind of role for me to play in my mind to just get me through the day… And if you came into my circle; you were walking into a role in my private movie of the day.

And I was Jealous of people who just seemed to waft through life. Who just seemed to have everything handed to them…They were beautiful and popular and brilliant and I had to work for everything.

But you know, what I didn't realize (being a teenager and therefore somewhat self-absorbed as they tend to be) was that the people passing me in the hallways had their own demons and flaws to overcome- or would have flaws and demons to overcome. Like, one girl; might be a cheerleader but she has a craptacular home life and would love to have a mother like mine. And one of the guys that seems to have it all going on; however, he's also going to have repeating bouts of cancer when he becomes an adult and not live long enough to see his kids grow up.

The guy that seems to have nothing but a good time on his plate is going to be an alcoholic and a drug abuser.

This other person is going to end up selling drugs.

And this guy; yeah, he's captain of the football team, but his dad is going to commit suicide shortly after he graduates from high school.

 

Jealousy is a useless emotion in human beings really.

My friend's, jealousy in human beings IS USE-LESS.

 

People are going to be jealous of you no matter what and people are going to treat you poorly sometimes because of reasons that seem insane and really no fault of your own.

 

I know in my life, when I was young, I was jealous of my cousin's material possessions and the fact that they were dark, and beautiful. However, I realize now that it was not always the best atmosphere in their home and that they were probably jealous of the fact that I had both parents in my home and none of the stresses of their family.

I know that there were people in school with me that were jealous of me because of my father's position in town and because of my last name growing up…..And really, trust me, when you are growing up with a prominent name in a small town, sometimes it's not the coolest thing in the world. Sometimes you would just like to be ambiguous. I know that even some were jealous of my red hair and the fair skin….Which completely perplexes me.

I know of someone when I was in high school that went out of her way to bad talk me to other people, who in turn hated me for no good reason. She was jealous of my position in my own family, she was jealous of the love that my parents showed me and even jealous of my siblings and the people in their families. It was ludicrous.

There was absolutely nothing I could do to change who I was and who my parents were and who my siblings married or for that matter, who their children were…Your position in life is what God gives you. There was absolutely nothing I could have done to change who I was because I was a child. And to be honest I wouldn't have even if I could have because this was my family, not theirs.

And because of other peoples influence and my grandmother and mother (who, in perpetuity, I will see in my minds eye as wringing their hands and putting their palms to their cheeks in concern) I became a nervous and paranoid person who can't stand the winter darkness…(So why am I in the mid-west with all it's winter darkness?)

Good news is that since high school, things have straightened out in my world and I and this person who was jealous of me have become okay with each other. I still can't grasp her jealousy, however, I am glad that I was not the only one whom she was jealous of and that other people were also the brunt of her self-loathing wrath.

And that is really what jealousy is isn't it-self-loathing and anger at your life not being what you want it to be in your own opinion? And envy….Envy at someone having something that you so desperately want and think will make your life okay?

And isn't meanness and jealousy and envy and self-loathing, all tied in together? Isn't there always something in there that makes a mean-spirited person the way they are….The fact that they didn't accomplish some goal in their lives or become the person that they thought that they would always become…Or have the family that they wanted or the career that they wanted, or was the highlight of someone's life or made someone happy whose opinion meant the world to them?

 

I began thinking about this while I was watching television one day and listening to people complaining about someone simply because they were jealous of them; and I say this because clearly it was jealousy and nothing to do with anything this person had done to them individually or to the world as a whole, their lives were just junk right now and they were digging on them because they were one those people who just seemed to have everything and they were vulnerable right now.

 

Like vultures, they were picking at them while they were down, simply because they could. This person just happened to have the extraordinary opportunity to be extremely blessed. And it was then that it occurred to me that jealousy is a largely useless emotion in human beings and causes some of the most astounding pain and grief in the world.

 

I'm sure there are reasons human beings are gifted with jealousy. But as human beings we can't control our jealous rage and therefore should try to alienate this need to be jealous of people, simply for the things they never asked for but were gifted with anyway. They were just blessed with different gifts than you- not better ones, just different ones.

 

Do not covet.

It's one of God's commandments.

 

The grass is always greener on the other side…However; they fail to tell you when you get there that the taxes are also higher.

 

You never know what the other persons life is going to be like and there are going to be things in their lives that are not going to be pleasant, even though you may not see them from the outside.

 

I am blessed.

 

Booga is verbal and not wheel chair bound. He is relatively healthy, however annoying at times. My husband loves me desperately and I strive to keep him happy and myself worthy of that love. My average children are smart and content, for the time being, and they love me and they are good people and grow spiritually in The Lord from time to time so I know I wasn't talking to the wall all the time while raising them.

They live far away; however, I do see them during the year. My husband's job affords us a comfortable living and it makes that possible…..And The Lord's blessings are always apparent in my life. Even though it might seem to the outsider that they are not….They very much are….And I thank you Lord Almighty Creator of Heaven and Earth for all the blessings you have bestowed on us.

 

I am blessed.

 

And I am jealous of no one…. any longer…..

Headlines in Northern Michigan

GM to discuss investment in Michigan plant
I've heard this music before folks...This ain't my first rodeo cowboy!

Help local students prepare for their career
    Give 'em a job.

Michigan gas prices up again
    What a epiphany that is....

Mich. AG says he'll sue to protect lakes from carp
    For a minute I thought that said, "Crap." And to that I would say...."Isn't it a little late?"

READ YOUR LOCAL NEWS! It's full of Carp.



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~ Everyone should learn to knit, it helps to deter the murderous rages....~

Pete Yates and Captain Obvious!

From the Desk of Pete Yates!
Some peoples kids!

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2759159/Jail-let-prisoner-grow-dope-in-his-cell.html
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Captain Obvious, protector and defender of all that is obvious! Headlines from local Michigan and National News organizations that just are so freakin obvious....Or just plain bizarre...

Winter accident
It's snowing again, do you know where your children are?

'Maytag Repairman' visits Saginaw
???

U of M Flint students robbed on campus
....Like that never happens....

GM announces management changes
....That should just be an ongoing headline....Like, "Today's Weather Forecast"- "GM Management Changes".

Kia dealership opens in Genesee County
YEE HA!!!

This is what I mean, this is a headline from a different day....Tell me how this differs from "GM Management Changes"?
MidMichigan's reactions to GM leadership change

H1N1 vaccine rules loosened, more change seen
You no longer need to have a sore throat....Just an inability to function as a normal human being will suffice to warrant being called "afflicted with H1N1"....
__________________________________________________________
So Fred... What's with the lights?



Same house, different song....

---

The Onion!
.........................................

Obama Tells Nation He's Going Out For Cigarettes 'I'll Be Right Back' Claims Commander In Chief

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/99468

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~Don't drink the water....~~

DOLLS....But not in a creepy way...

I love this idea, and I think everyone should send a doll.
Family asking for dolls to give away this Christmas

Send dolls to:

6174 Emerald Drive
Grand Blanc, MI
48439

And give a toy or two to Toys For Tots....I'll be checking out those barrels and they better get filled.....



Just remember...I know where you cap....

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~I just love ya, who could stay mad at someone with that face.....~

Only in Northern Michigan and The Onion

Montmorency County Man Wants To Grow Industrial Hemp

As do we all....

Thousands With No Power

More on the state of American citizen's control over their own government later.....


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The Onion

This Would Be The Best Mental Hospital Ever If Elliott Gould Weren't Hiding In The Toilet

I feel that way all the time.

Grandma Concerned About Dinner Roll Count

That's always my mother's concern also.
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FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES and his nephews....

The Muppets do while my guitar gently weeps.....



*GASP!* That's actually kind of sweet.


The Muppets do Bohemian Rhapsody!



*GASP!* That's actually pretty frickin hilarious. *Snicker*

Only in Northern Michigan News! And FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!

6 local children adopted
Thank God...They were getting on my nerves....

Bald Eagles spotted near local school
....And sadly shortly afterward were seen soaring skyward, with the six adopted local children in their talons.

Thanksgiving eating without guilt
Catholics say it can't be done.
_________________________________________________
I think this guy and my dad must hang out.
Being as my dad is a super villain and a mad-scientist....



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An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day. ~Irv Kupcinet

PROFOUND and yet perfunctory.....

I got this in my email. NBC25 always put some kind of summary underneath to talk about what the story is about in a nutshell. Well check out what imaginative summarizing they had going on with this one.....

Woman in custody after drug lab bust
A woman is in custody following a drug bust.

Wow! In a year of Sundays, I would never come up with something like that. Change one word and it changes the face of that whole sentence. That's "Tolkienesque" in how profound that statement is...I mean, I couldn't have done a better job on that.....KUDO'S Afternoon Update! Well done!
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The ONION

December Named National Awareness Month

  We need one of those really...

U.S. Deports Lou Dobbs

*snickers!*

And in Opinion

Who Swoons Over 'New Moon'? Jackie Harvey

Well, teenage girls .... What's with that anyway? I mean, why would someone want to date a vampire? He's dead, he's cold, he's pale and can't be in the sun so, skinny dipping on a hot, sunny day is out! He probably smells....EW!

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~<Insert pithy comment here>~

Sarah Palin is a legend in her own mind and ONLY IN NORTHERN MICHIGAN and FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!

Hundreds wait for Gov. Sarah Palin in MI
Cause we're "...Like Alaska with all the huntin and the fishin and the hockey moms...."
*Shivers!*
Have you not read "Only in Northern Michigan?"

ONLY IN NORTHERN MICHIGAN!
MI unemployment drops slightly
And the peasants rejoice....

Michigan man wins 'Rock, Paper, Scissors' World Championship
Rock should beat paper man....

FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!!!
http://www.uncrate.com/men/gear/office/mmmvelopes/

Num Num Num!

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~SPEAK SPEAK- WHY DON'T YOU SPEAK!!!~

Michigan's Thumb eyed for more wind turbines
I keep seeing Michigan's thumb in their eye.

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~There is nothing funny about clowns...~

Thanksgiving is coming

I got this from a Capper....
Thanks Moldy!
___________________________________________________________________________________________________

For those here who are my friends and family, just a quick note to let you know that Martha Stewart will not be dining with us this Thanksgiving. I'm telling you in advance, so don't act surprised. Since Ms. Stewart won't be coming, I've made a few small changes:

 
Our sidewalk will not be lined with homemade, paper bag luminaries. After a trial run, it was decided that no matter how cleverly done, rows of flaming lunch sacks do not have the desired welcoming effect.



Once inside, our guests will note that the entry hall is not decorated with the swags of Indian corn and fall foliage I had planned to make. Instead, I've gotten the guests involved in the decorating by having them track in colorful autumn leaves from the front yard. The mud was their idea from last year.



The dining table will not be covered with expensive linens, fancy china, or crystal goblets. If possible, we will use dishes that match and everyone will get a fork. Since this IS Thanksgiving, we will refrain from using the plastic skull goblet or the Santa napkins from last Christmas.



Our centerpiece will not be the tower of fresh fruit and flowers that I promised. Instead we will be displaying a hedgehog-like decoration hand-crafted from the finest construction paper. I assure you it is a turkey.



We will be dining fashionably late. The kids will entertain you while you wait. I'm sure they will be happy to share every choice comment I have made regarding Thanksgiving, pilgrims and the turkey hotline. Please remember that most of these comments were made at 5:00 a.m. upon discovering that the turkey was still hard enough to cut diamonds.



As accompaniment to the kids recital, I will play a recording of tribal drumming. If the kids should mention that I don't own a recording of tribal drumming, or that tribal drumming sounds suspiciously like a frozen turkey in a clothes dryer, ignore them. They are lying.



I toyed with the idea of ringing a dainty silver bell to announce the start of our feast. In the end, I chose to keep the traditional method. I've also decided against a formal seating arrangement. When the smoke alarm sounds, please gather around the table and sit where you like. In the spirit of harmony, I will ask the kids to sit at a separate table. In a separate room. Next door maybe.



Now, I know you have all seen pictures of one person carving a turkey in front of a crowd of appreciative onlookers. This will not be happening at our dinner. For safety reasons, the turkey will be carved in a private ceremony. I stress "private" meaning: Do not, under any circumstances, enter the kitchen to laugh at me. Do not enter to check on my progress. I have an electric knife. The turkey is unarmed. It stands to reason that I will eventually win. When I do, we will eat.



I would like to take this opportunity to remind my diners that "passing the rolls" is not a football play.



Before I forget, there is one last change. Instead of offering a choice between 12 different scrumptious desserts, we will be serving the traditional pumpkin pie, garnished with whipped cream and fingerprints. You will still have a choice; take it or leave it. I hope you aren't too disappointed that Martha Stewart will not be dining with us this Thanksgiving. She probably won't come next year either.

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That's awesome. But she left out that she will not be held responsible for those people who end up with Salmonella poisoning, since you're all too lame and cheap to have dinner at your house and since you all believed that this was a good idea to have it at mine.
Have you not talked to my husband about my cooking skills?

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~One time we had a picnic at the lake on July the Fourth and oddly, my husband and I got sick with the flu the next day....It just came on all the sudden and no one had been sick around us? ~

Hey Snope it out!

http://www.snopes.com/fraud/distress/valentin.asp
Use your head on the net.

http://www.snopes.com/photos/military/gebhardt.asp
This one is true and I've actually gotten this one in my email.

                          *VIRUS!*

http://www.snopes.com/computer/virus/facebook.asp
                          *VIRUS!*
Just in case you didn't see it the first time.

And from my friend Xig!
http://www.snopes.com/glurge/nodesks.asp
Personally, I thought it was pretty cool!

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~Takes a village to raise an idiot.~

More amazingly mundanes in Michigan

Medical marijuana law's grey areas affect police, patients, caregivers
Because it can can can.....

Officer tased handcuffed man
Afterward he said to other officers, "What!?! Like you wouldn't?"

Mich. Senate approves bill after baby-sitting flap
As if there isn't anything more important in the world.

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~It's not me it's you.~

Only in Northern Michigan.....Sometimes....

This is what the news looks like when nothing happens.....

Library Renovations Almost Complete

AND....

Ski Hill Making Snow For Annual Event

..............................................................................................................................................................................................
..............................................................................................................................................................................................
..............................................................................................................................................................................................

This is actually a pretty sad story- but honestly, if a young child saw this on a web page it would give them pause and yet, here it is...

A city mourns as 'Santa Claus' has passed away


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~Stay with me people...~

Only in Northern Michigan and FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!!!

Only in Northern Michigan and possibly other cold Midwestern states like oh, Wisconsin and Minnesota....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Big NEWS!

New jewelry store opens in Bay City

...............................................................................Cut on the line..........................................................................................
Training Chinese auto dealers


WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING! TO COMBAT THEIR BELLIGERENT SALES TECHNIQUES!
....................................................................................................................................................................................

November is 'hire a veteran' month
*deep sigh* Every month should be "hire a veteran" month....

....................................................................................................................................................................................

Man Sentenced To Three Years For Business Break-ins

One was "Burton Taxidermy". Again, *deep sigh*.
....................................................................................................................................................................................

Hospital Wins Award For Digital Medical Records

Wow, I would go to that hospital if I get sick because of their amazing medical records keeping capabilities. Forgo all those dubious comforts that medicine and Xrays could afford me.
....................................................................................................................................................................................

_________________________FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!!!_______________________________

BUSTED!!!

Can anyone tell me why anyone would believe ANYTHING from Fox News after seeing this?

http://www.thedailyshow.com/

I, my friend, gave up on FOX Entertainment News after I watched them one Sunday morning, deep fry a thick bunch of papers that were supposedly a bill....Because they wanted to fry up so much pork.....

Like, there is nothing else to do on a news show except for Rupert Murdoch's Australian bidding.
But God love ya for bringing it to our attention!
________________________________________________________________________________________
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~What?!? No gravy?~

And now.....The Onion

United Airlines Exploring Viability Of Stacking Them Like Cordwood

Well, it's about time. I for one always think it would be preferable to be laying down rather than sitting up while flying.

Cherokee Nation Makes Headlines As Fraction Of Actress's Bloodline

Me too....SISTAH!

First Female Tower Of London Guard Bullied

What makes her think she's any better than the rest of us women working in men's careers?
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Only in Northern Michigan

Made in Michigan: Vlasic Pickles
Vlasic Pickles are made in Imlay City, MI

Good for Imlay City....What do you want from me?

FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!

http://www.naplesnews.com/news/2009/oct/28/police-crack-cape-local-women-involved-unrelated-y/

Two local women were involved in unrelated, quirky car crashes. First, Kara Leanne Griffin, 24, of Golden Gate Estates, reportedly rear-ended a farm trailer Thursday night.

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....More- Only in Northern Michigan

Wool products made in Michigan
Like, other states don't do that....*deep sigh* <shakes head>

By Dan Armstrong
Monday, November 02, 2009 at 3:43 p.m.

You likely know about Flint's Koegel Meats and Michigan Sugar, but did you know that some of the largest custom wool processing operations in the country are in Frankenmuth?

The process starts in old-fashioned bathtubs. Raw fibers are heated to 180-degrees and washed with a mild detergent.

It's then taken to an extractor to remove excess moisture......(And it goes on like that)....

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FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES! and Only in Northern Michigan

FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!

Switched-off thieves fooled by fake TV

 What makes me laugh about this is that retaliation is messing up the bed....
Apparently they also left notes saying that "Judy is fat and has big ears!"


WOULD-be television thieves in Melbourne were left red-faced after they tried to steal a cardboard cut-out in a bungled burglary.

Intruders broke into a vacant display home in Arnolds Creek Blvd, Melton West, between 7.30am and midday on Sunday after seeing a large plasma television through a window.

After smashing a front door window to gain entry, the thieves received a nasty surprise upon discovering the television set was a cardboard cut-out used for display purposes only.

__________________________________________________________

Only in Northern Michigan


Family Uses Craig's List To Find Stolen Property
Posted: 10/28/2009

A family who recently fell victim to thieves is taking matters into their own hands via the Internet.
After checking EBay and Craig's List to see if their belongs were for sale, they were inspired.

They decided to post about the theft to try and track down their things.. or the thieves.


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~Takes a village to raise an idiot.~

Only in Northern Michigan and from the desk of Pete Yates!

Man Accused Of Shooting Son-in-Law

Understood.

___________________From the Desk of Pete Yates!_____________________

The Department of Transportation has released an animation of the Alaskan Way Viaduct in a simulated earthquake.
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/flatpages/video/seattletimesvideo.html?bcpid=30884189001&bclid=0&bctid=46395517001

Mother of CRAP!
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Deer Accident....

Victim identified in Clare Co. Motorcycle/Deer Accident

People think I make this stuff up and I don't. Hey, they are rural rats right now there are so many of them and people die because of car/deer accidents and motorcycle/deer accidents and the deer die of starvation if they are not harvested. So why not give the meat to soup kitchens and food pantry's if your not going to eat it and give their lives at least some meaning.

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Going all out for All Hallow's Eve - The Morning Sun Life: Serving Clare, Gratiot and Isabella counties

Going all out for All Hallow's Eve - The Morning Sun Life: Serving Clare, Gratiot and Isabella counties

Posted using ShareThis

I really don't care if you don't like cats....Really...

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~Cats meow at me; they want to make me feed them.

However, they will not get meat today….~

Onion Peels, Only in Northern Michigan and Baltimore celebrates Poe!

Onion Peels!

Sotomayor Misses Supreme Court Case After Failing To Get Out Of Jury Duty

Uh oh.

Cell Phone Stuck In 2-Year Contract With Local Man

Unfortunately it's common to hate your phone....
_____________________________________________
Only in Northern Michigan

Car crashes into Rosebush Post Office

Published:

Wednesday, October 14, 2009 5:48 AM EDT

a 2006 Buick LaCrosse driven by 87-year-old Onalee Swindlehurst was jammed into the side of the building.

Ciochetto said that Swindlehurst told him that "her foot slipped."

Swindlehurst, a lifelong resident of Rosebush, was on her way to the post office to drop off some mail, her son Lynn Swindlehurst, said.

"If my mother were here, she would say 'I'm mad, I'm upset, that I did this,'" Lynn Swindlehurst said.

Swindlehurst said that his mother called him from the back seat of her car.

"An OnStar operator called me at work," Swindlehurst said. "I wondered what they wanted, and she told me that my mother wanted to talk to me. "And that she was in an accident."

Swindlehurst said that he is his mother's insurance agent, and that her automobile insurance would pay for the damage to her car and to the post office."

Ciochetto said that no one else was in the car, and alcohol was not a factor. Swindlehurst was taken to the hospital after complaining she had chest pain.

"The airbag was deployed," Chiochetto said. "When I arrived, she was alert."

___________________________________________And also_________________________________________________

Baltimore celebrates Poe's funeral in Poe style

(ARA) - Two hundred years ago, a man remembered for his dark sense of mystery, macabre stories and questionable sanity was born. Edgar Allan Poe is one of Baltimore's most famous residents, and his adoptive city is having a huge celebration this fall complete with displays of works inspired by his chilling tales and a funeral celebration around his grave.
Baltimore recognizes Poe in many ways - the Baltimore Ravens are named after one of his well-known characters, every year on the anniversary of his death the mysterious Poe Toaster anonymously leaves three roses and a bottle of cognac on his gravestone, and there are rumors of his ghost haunting Baltimore's The Horse You Came In On Saloon, one of the last places he was seen alive.

The Baltimore Museum of Art will be hosting an exhibition featuring works of art inspired by Poe's frightful tales and poems. Opening on Oct. 4 and extending into January, the exhibition will include rare prints, drawings and book illustrations, and will be accompanied by live performances, poetry workshops and film screenings, including the 48-hour film project which had a film team who had a Poe character, a line of dialogue from one of his works, a theme and 48 hours to complete their movie.

Just so happens I was there less than two weeks ago....
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NOT SO-PRECIOUS MOMENTS COLLECTION 2009

Oh boy....Not so much....
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From the Desk of Pete Yates

________________From the Desk of Pete Yates!__________________________
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/wales/8296190.stm


Cage fighters' stag night web hit

Cage fighters picked on because they were dressed as women for a stag night say they are surprised that CCTV of the incident has become an internet hit.


A CCTV camera first captured the pair in a fight outside a nightclub with a man dressed as Spider-Man.


You know it cannot have been a good night when you get into a fight with Spider-Man and two cross-dressing men
Mark Davies, defence lawyer

They are then seen walking along Kingsway before Gardener confronts Mr Lilley, dressed in black hot pants and a pink wig.

After throwing a punch at him, Gardner and then Fender are both quickly floored by Mr Lerwell, wearing a short black dress with stockings and suspenders.

<one eyebrow raises>


_____________________

No no, really it's real....
No really...

http://www.theday.com/re.aspx?re=ba5f7a2c-2f37-4d42-be82-067051f05a19

Stonington says insulting sign can stay.
Couple left message in big letters for neighbors they had feuded with over the years.
Stonington - The big "F" and the big "U" can stay.
___________________________

Train drags German mooner half naked along tracks

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/22/20091012/tsc-oukoe-uk-germany-bottom-011ccfa.html

A German man mooning at railway staff in a departing train got his trousers caught in a carriage door and ended up being dragged half naked along the platform, out of the station and onto the tracks.

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