http://www.snopes.com/critters/wild/babybird.asp Apparently touching a baby bird will not make it's mother reject them. It's pure hogwash- pure horse-hockey! ==================================================================================== FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES! <δραματική μουσική ενθέτων εδώ> or <insert dramatic music here>
In case you missed this yesterday...
Representative Anthony Weiner (D-NY) calls Republicans, "Wholly-owned subsidiaries of the insurance industry" on the house floor.
To listen to talk radio, to watch TV pundits, to read a newspaper's online message board, is to realize that increasingly, we are a people estranged from critical thinking, divorced from logic, alienated from even objective truth.
A man walked into a police station in southern Sweden last week to complain about the quality of the hash that he had been sold, asking for a lump to be tested for traces of LSD. ______________________The Onion_____________________________
Police capture escaped zebra in downtown Atlanta http://www.9and10news.com/Category/Story/?id=207198&cID=76 Posted: 2/18/2010 ATLANTA (AP) — An escaped circus zebra has been rounded up in Atlanta after it led police on a chase through the downtown area and along an interstate highway.
Md. lawmaker: Ban first-cousin marriages as unsafe http://www.9and10news.com/Category/Story/?id=207129&cID=76 Posted: 2/18/2010 ANNAPOLIS, Md. (AP) — A Maryland state legislator says it's time to ban marriages between first cousins and stop playing what he calls "genetic roulette" with their offspring. Henry Heller, a Democratic delegate, or state representative, says he wants to bring Maryland "into the enlightened world of other states such as West Virginia and Arkansas" that already prohibit unions of first cousins.
Posted: 2/17/2010 LEWISTON, Idaho (AP) — A marriage got off to a rocky start after the 21-year-old groom from northern Idaho was arrested twice on his wedding night and charged with assaulting his new wife in nearby eastern Washington. Police say that after Lewis was released on bail, he assaulted his new wife at a home in nearby Clarkston, Wash. The bride told authorities she was slapped and choked during the altercation, the Lewiston Tribune reports.
'Fat birds get laid sooner, have more one-night stands'
German profs stick tracker bugs to subjects' bottoms
German boffins have carried out a groundbreaking study into the habits of fat birds as compared to thin ones. They say that the plumper subjects in their sample had more one-night stands than the slim ones, and that the chubbies in general achieved sexual congress sooner than their lightweight counterparts.
Full details of the research into warblers can be read courtesy of the Royal Society journal Biology Letters, here. ® _See it's not just the painter Ruben and my husband that think a little meat on the bone is sexier than stick figures with boobs. *wink*
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Perhaps if they were drinking Budweiser Select 55, the first story could have been avoided.
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Perhaps if they were drinking Budweiser Select 55, the first story could have been avoided.
Wife jailed after fight over husband urinating on the floor, Pasco deputies say
By Erin Sullivan, Times Staff Writer In Print: Thursday, February 18, 2010
WESLEY CHAPEL — Deanne Elsholz said her husband urinated on the bathroom floor.
David Elsholz just wanted to go back to sleep.
It was almost midnight Monday at their mobile home at 5951 Woodsman Drive in the Angus Valley community.
Deputies who arrived later said the place was cluttered with Natural Light beer cans, and both husband and wife appeared to be drunk.
"What are you doing?" Deanne, 44, asked David, 50, when she heard his urine spraying the floor, according to what she told authorities.
She said her husband then slapped her about the head with a towel and, in retaliation, she threw a glass from her nightstand at his face. It hit him in the nose, a report states, and blood poured down his chest and arms.
Then, Deanne "ran into the bathroom and slipped on David's pee," the report states.
So couldn't slipping on her husbands urine be considered "Peemediated Attempted Battery?"
Tickle Cock Bridge returned to original name after row
A Victorian landmark has been recognised by its traditional risqué name after locals were offended by a council's politically correct alternative.
Would it help if it was called, "Tickled Nuts?"
.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·. ~ Est queadam fiere voluptas.There is a certain pleasure in weeping. (Ovid) ~
I'm sometimes given pause by Oprah Winfrey, who is clearly an intelligent, educated woman....And I'll tell you why... Sometimes she does some really oblivious things. Things that make me say to myself," And you just noticed this?"
For instance she had on her book club one month the book," East of Eden". Now she talks about this as if this is something that perhaps no one her age has ever read before. Well, I read it in high school. I also read "The Winter of our Discontent" also by Steinbeck. In highschool.
So...You're just getting to the whole, deep reading phase?
Okay, I'll admit- I've never read "Catcher in the Rye." I believe it may be too late.
But still....
Her latest thing is a campaign to stop people from texting, cell phone talking or anything really to do with a cell phone in the car.
Well that doesn't stop those people who read speeches, newspapers, textbooks, work on their laptops, do their hair, put on makeup, discipline their kids, make love, slap people in the back seat, play with the radio, or flip through CD's...
Obviously for twenty or so years ya'll's been usin a driver cause I've noticed this stuff goin on for awhile...And it ain't got nuthin to do with the advent of cell phones.
This is what I mean....Just an observation mind you.
.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·. ~ Est queadam fiere voluptas.There is a certain pleasure in weeping. (Ovid) ~
My friends car in Baltimore, Maryland....Yea, she'll see it again, in the spring................Hopefully..... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VATICAN CITY (AP) — Call it the Vatican's 10 commandments for good listening. The Holy See's newspaper Saturday published its picks for pop rock paradise, ranging from Michael Jackson's album Thriller to Pink Floyd's The Dark Side of the Moon and the Beatles' Revolver.
.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·. There was a great loss today in the entertainment world. The man who wrote the song "Hokey Pokey" has died. What was really horrible is that they had trouble putting the body in the casket. They'd put his left leg in... well, you know the rest.
Most people can tell you that I harbor no fondness for Grand Rapids. The streets were laid out by monkeys. However today they surpassed themselves in Incompetence.
In true Gerald R. Ford style, the airport in Grand Rapids Michigan managed somehow to either loose or ignore a person coming up to a bin full of my husbands stuff- that just went through the security x-ray and lose his passport and boarding pass in the machine and/or be oblivious enough not to notice someone stealing his boarding pass and passport.
Now I say oblivious because in this day and age of computers, camera's and video monitoring, the TSA at GR told him and I quote," Our camera's don't have good enough resolution to ID someone." Although they are apparently supposedly going to get new cameras soon-even though they have a state of the art garage that costs millions.
Not only that but they lost a piece of my husbands luggage that was supposed to be retrieved from the plane that was sitting there on the tarmac getting ready to leave.
After an hour of police reports and putting out a description of my husband's extremely well traveled passport and boarding pass. My husband, who was on his way to Israel, Greece and then Scotland and England, was told by one TSA dude,"Hey, we could reissue you a boarding pass and you could you use the passport copy." My husband replied, "It's bad enough to get into countries with a passport, imagine having to try with a copy."
What kills me is that they also had the gall to remind him that tomorrow is President's Day and that he would probably be unable to get another pass port tomorrow either. Thank you GR.! Nice.
-------------------FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!----------------------
This guy clearly works for Grand Rapids Gerald R. Ford International Airport in TSA. Because he's a brain trust....
(02-12) 22:30 PST CITY OF COMMERCE, Calif. (AP) --
Sheriff's officials say 22-year-old Joshua Vasquez was arrested Friday after he allegedly tried to deface a glass door leading into a City of Commerce meeting room where over 100 Los Angeles County sheriff's deputies and police officers were attending a training class.
'Not only that, but the weight of the average viewer has increased by about 42 pounds since then.'
.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·. ~ Est queadam fiere voluptas.There is a certain pleasure in weeping. (Ovid) ~
Snow days may come on count day The big snow forecasted to hit Michigan hard Tuesday could lead to many school closings Wednesday. This on the day slated as "Student Count Day."
------------------------------------------------------Snopes------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://www.snopes.com/fraud/topscams.asp Top Scams in our hard times.
Honestly, they would have had to cuff my whole class.
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Makes you really rethink that food fight.... ______________________________________________________________________________________________________ At first I thought this said Catholic Powers move to GM SPO....And I was thinking "Whoa, the Catholic Church is like, wayyyy too strong."
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________ ♫ Everyone has a story....♫ But um in this case....Dude...You know you're an addict when....
FLINT (AP) -- Authorities say a man accused of stealing a car then reporting it stolen remains in custody after telling Flint police he was robbed at gunpoint while trying to buy crack cocaine with a credit card.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________ Beer and bones The newest in doggy bars....
Actual comments on Facebook for your dining and dancing pleasure....
S.K. Whoa, the world just became tragically dark...And it was like in a matter of seconds.. P. Y. Hey, just because they swore in the new GOP senator from MA, it's not the end of the world... Oh, wait. Something else? S. K. No, that's most likely it. D. F. A former model who posed in the nude...yeah, I'm weeping profusely too.
G.O.P. Senator Is Sworn In, and Democrats Regroup By CARL HULSE and JEFF ZELENY Published: February 5, 2010 President Obama and Congressional Democratic leaders sought to reset their agenda as they lost their 60th vote in the Senate on Thursday.
I want to apologize for the previous entry posted Wednesday, February 3, 2010. This is a good cautionary tale why it's not good to write when your under the influence of cold medicines whose active ingredients are primary contributors to an illegal drug....I just read it and muther of Todd....I must say, "Wow!"
However, I am not going to ask what I was on, because well, I know-Sudafed, the generic brand. "Eiy!" Photo credit: clarita from morguefile.com
THE OREGON WILDERNESS—'I think World War II was justified, and I got behind the first Gulf War [in 1990],' said the bird, who has served as the national symbol of the United States since 1782. 'But the recent war in Iraq.....'
MIAMI—Giddiness overtook the locker rooms of both Super Bowl teams Thursday when members of the New Orleans Saints and Indianapolis Colts caught wind that a representative from the Pro Football Hall of Fame might be attending the game next Sunday.Upon hearing the news, Colts quarterback Peyton Manning reportedly rushed to the team bathroom and began throwing up.
Matt Breckman, Parking Attendant 'That's just another few years Buzz Aldrin will have to wait to get his wallet back.'
Jody Hanson, Milk Hauler "It's about time the government put space exploration in the capable hands of the private sector. I personally can't wait to ride on the Arby's 1."
Christian Yazbek, Salt Spreader "But moon people turned out in record droves to vote Democrat!"
MOSCOW—Orbiting the earth aboard the International Space Station, Expedition 9 scientists were chagrined to report a bevy of equipment and supply problems stemming from the behavior of an inquisitive raccoon Monday.
UPDATE: LaHood says he misspoke Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood now says he misspoke when telling owners of recalled Toyotas to stop driving them.
Yeah, now that all these people are bringing back their cars and saying they don't want them anymore and that they are never going to buy another one.... "No no, drive the cars....But in case the gas pedal sticks, put it in nuetral and steer towards the side of the road....If that doesn't work, then stick your head between your legs and kiss your butt goodbye!"
5 people rescued from Saginaw Bay More brain trusts...Why? Why? Why are you trying to ice fish on Saginaw Bay...Are you going to eat Blinky?
.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·.•·.·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·..·´¯`·.·•.·:*¨¨*:·. *Update, I slept for four hours this morning after my son went to school....* Probably the most exciting news in Michigan today.
Well, it’s four o’clock in the morning and I haven’t gotten to sleep yet. Hmmm, that’s not good. I might say that’s a bad thing.
Okay, so here’s the deal. I have this cold. It’s not bad and by not bad I am meaning that it’s not incapacitating, it’s a cold. I had this monster flu in the fall. I’m not going to say it was Swine Flu because well, I never went to the doctor. but all indications point to a big “Yes” because I couldn’t function. I mean, I ran a fever, I coughed like no tomorrow, and I sat in my living room one night and basically allowed my body to bath in its own sweat until my fever broke. It was pretty horrific. However, I espouse the belief that what does not kill you makes you stronger. Thank you Conan the Barbarian….
SO I was thinking that this is not that bad of a cold, I’ll drink Echinacea tea and eat chicken soup and take it easy for a day or two (HA!) and then I’ll be back on my feet.
Well, here’s the problem with me carrying on with that theory; when I was a little girl, I had pneumonia. If any of you have had pneumonia you know what that is like. I felt like I was drowning inside my own body, I couldn’t breathe. This is something I never got over.
To this day, I can’t stand for other people to touch my nose. I can’t stand my nose to be plugged. It makes my eyes water and I want to scream. And what’s worse is that after you are hospitalized with Pneumonia you walk along life and pick up every single cold and flu bug that briefly passes you by because, well, your immune system is compromised. I had more colds in high school than most teenagers simply because of my immune system being trashed. I just had to be around someone with a slight cough and it would turn into a raging cold.
It got a slight bit better as I got older, but still I couldn’t stand it not to be able to breathe.
So when I developed allergies early on because of my compromised immune system, I got hooked on nasal decongestants, the spray kind, because I constantly wanted my airways clear and when you have children and pets and allergies and a compromised immune system, you’re constantly congested. So I constantly have a thing of decongestant spray in my purse. My husband calls it “Nose Candy”. And you would not believe the looks I get from people when he casually mentions that we need to stop and get me some “Nose Candy.”
I have to explain to them that it isn’t the kind of nose candy they are thinking of. That it’s my own kind of legal nose candy and watch the color come back into their faces.
So back to this cold; Booga came home with a cold. His teacher was pretty funny, because of course; she’s never had this problem. She came out to the car and said, “Well, he’s a little congested, we have the sniffles going around the classroom…”
Oh great. Thanks to whoever’s mom or dad dropped off junior or juniorette with a cold. Lovely.
So of course, I got the cold. And it’s a cold. No big deal-right?
Well, I take stuff to help me sleep because I have always had problems sleeping. I don’t know why. I sometimes attribute it to the hideous nightmares I had as a child that were the result of my father’s insistence on watching the evening news at dinner in the 1960’s and 70’s. These people back then, for the sake of shock and awe, televised the entire Vietnam War. Not the best thing for a child between the age of 5- 10. On top of that, there was always talk about the war in our house. My mother’s cousins were over there and my one brother was draft age and in fact did get drafted and was 4-f.
So as an adult I had issues with sleep to begin with put on top of that the issues of my adulthood- Booga, my husband’s profession, and 911 and it’s a cocktail for insomnia. And I am quite aware that I need help to sleep because I am not getting there on my own. I almost fear it until I am in it and then I could sleep for days.
Well, when you have a cold and your taking all sorts of over the counter medications, you can’t take sleep-aids because they themselves usually make you sleepy. So I stop taking them when I am taking cold medications like nighttime decongestants and “Tylenol Cough and Cold”. I am counting on that “Tylenol Cold and Cough Night Time” to put me out.
Yesterday, I talked to my husband and I told him casually that I wouldn’t mind having a cold if it didn’t have to come with the nasal congestion and the dripping and so forth and he said, “Well, hey you should go to the drug store and ask for the Sudafed that they have behind the counter. The kind you have to show your drivers license for. That will dry your sinuses right up.”
Well, there is a reason they have this stuff behind the counter, it’s because people make (along with some other chemicals) Methamphetamines out of it. The thing about Meth is this (and the only reason I know this because I read a long article on it) Methamphetamines will cause you to be hyper, and you don’t sleep and have to do something with all this energy. And now I know why this stuff is such a big ingredient in this illegal drug because here I am at 4:36 in the morning, typing this long entry because I can’t sleep. And it’s not just because of the cold. It’s because of the Sudafed.
So, clearly not gonna be able to take this in the evening, quite possibly not going to be able to take this full stop.
Thanks dad for your contribution to my insomnia. I appreciate that. Watching the nightly news are you? Yeah, I watch it too at dinner time- reminds me of home.
Probably around 6:30 AM or so, I will take a sleep aid and get three hours of sleep before someone calls the house and wakes me up or less. But friends it’s been a long night.
The band was the Crocodileson the “Last Call with Carson Daly” last night, and it was pretty friggin hideous. It might have been what was called “art” or “New Wave” but I call it “Just Noise.” I mean I probably would have done a different song than what they were playing. And I know that you’re an emo kid running around with all sorts of parental issues but dude, take some music classes in college. Your band doesn’t have to sound like the Emergency Broadcast Systems alert throughout three quarters of your song to get it across that you’re angry.
I love music, I mean; I have music going all the time. I have XM in my car. I have tons of music I have acquired. My kids give me music to keep for them so I have their music. I listen to everything from pop to rap. I’m not crazy about all rap, some of it is just okay. Some of it, with the right blend of music is not bad. I think it gets bad press from some parents. Some of it does. SOME OF IT. Some of it is, clearly trash.
But this was just plain NOISE.
I almost never get out of bed to turn off my television, I put it on the sleep timer and I listen to it while I go to sleep. And I literally got up and turned this crap off. Ugh! They played this one song that was like a tape replaying over and over, the same sound. I’m sorry, that’s not music, not in a long shot.
I include this in the "Only in Northern Michigan" things also....Isn't that Bigamy? ******************************************************************** GM's plan to sell Hummer to Chinese co. delayed Ooo, GM is desperate....Don't sell yourself, there's no reason for it boys!
UPDATE: Missing MI teen in Cancun found safe She's been seen being pulled by her ear by her grandmother and smacked on the butt several times by her great grandmother, who was heard to say, "When we get home....All the windows and doors are shut!" Which was followed by begging and pleading by the missing teen.... State gas prices are down a nickel Woo hoo.
Snowfest draws thousands Unfortunately, festival goers were ritualistically eaten by a tribe of Zombie Snowmen.
Not a Zombie Snowman.....
__________AND THE MOST IMPORTANT NEWS O' THE DAY!!!______________
---------------------From The Desk of Pete Yates!----------------------
The thing about an ex is that they know EXACTLY which buttons to push to drive you nuts.
Out of Stockholm, Sweden. (Okay, technically a suburb, of Stockholm, but I don't know how to make those two little dots over an "a" like they use... Darnit.)
A 59-year-old man has been arrested for using his ex-wife's musophobia to wreak cruel revenge for their break up after he pushed 19 mice through her letter box on Sunday morning.
I actually did this to my mother-only I used Gerbils....I was a "More Wretched" child....
----------------------------------------------------------Michigan Headlines-------------------------------------------------------------- Organizers Say Best RV Show In Years
If you've ever had a question about farming, the 11th annual northern michigan small farm conference was the place to be today. Here's my thing, check out the words "Northern Michigan Small Farm Conference" none of which is capitalized because apparently it's not really a proper name?....That's from the friggin email I get and it's like they're ashamed now because the link is gone. LOL Yeah. Maybe it's because it's a "small" farm conference....What d'ya think? These are professionals-they know what they're doing. Other than that-that whole conference...I mean, I bet people are liked lined up around the block for this, they're selling tee shirts with 11th annual MSFC and they're all high-fiving each other...Yea, I bet that's a party.
_________________From The Desk of Pete Yates! In The News!________________________
SAN DIEGO — A man who was busy robbing his elderly victim Saturday became so upset when a bystander tried to break up the crime by punching him in the face that he called police to report an assault.
Bad move.
<Bugs Bunny>*Would I call the police to report an assault while robbing an elderly man officer?* < Irish Beat Cop with Irish brogue>"You might rabbit- you might....." _____________________________________________________________
On Craig (Masey) Ferguson....<which in Michigan is what you think of when you see Ferguson....Especially those guys at the Michigan Small Farm Conference up there....> And Dana Eagle...Great name....
