___________The Onion_____________
Science Channel Refuses To Dumb Down Science Any Further
Massive Earthquake Reveals Entire Island Civilization Called 'Haiti'
Frantic Steve Jobs Stays Up All Night Designing Apple Tablet
I Don't Even Want To Be Alive Anymore- Rush Limbaugh
______________________________________About this Ipad Thing Already_______________________________________About this Ipad thing already....
Okay, something I must say, what's up with all these people and their particular penchant for bad names? Tell me? What's up with that?
I remember when I was told that Microsoft was coming out with a new operating system to replace "XP". My first thought was "Why?" My second thought was, "It's too soon you morons, and you still haven't got all the holes patched up in this one yet." However, when I heard what they were calling the Beta I was intrigued....."Longhorn", Ooooh "Longhorn".
Sounds almost like something your mother is going to slap you-about doesn't it?
There was sort of a snorting of a bull and muscular, leathery, sweatiness about the name. As if it was gleaned from the Montana sky to grace your desktop with its meaty format.
However, somehow, somewhere, someone got it in their head that Microsoft might be better served with another name.
It probably didn't go like this:
"Say let's try another name?"
"Well, like what?"
"Well, let's name it after a really cool car."
"Hmmm, let's name it something like, 'Cougar'?"
"No no, we want something to conjure up visions of home."
"Humph, okay, let's name it 'Road master'!"
"Is it a navigation system or an operating system?"
"Yeah, you're probably right."
"Let's name it after the first car I ever drove!?!"
"Ford!?!"
"No! Let's name it after my dad's rusted out old station wagon and call it 'VISTA'!!!"
And so, the calamity that was VISTA was born.
So we take this walk along our digital lives for a short time and we play with our Ipod's and mess with our Iphones, and then one day we wake up and on the news, here's little Stevie Jobs with the next great technical thing and what does he name it?
Ipad.
Ipad? Really? Ipad? That's a joke right? You're not really going to name it Ipad are you? I mean, why are you guys giving operating systems and information interfaces names that other operating systems and laptops and even mini laptops are going to beat up these operating systems, information interfaces about? Did you name your kid a name that he was going to get beat up by other kids about like, "Günter" or "Kit"?
With massively sweaty palms should you be sending this device into the world….Massively sweaty palms….Because honesty, if this doesn't work out the damage to your ego is going to be astronomical.
*
Brier Dudley's Blog:
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/technologybrierdudleysblog/2010909639_apple_ipad_bad_name_choice.html
"Apple i Pad: Bad name choice?
SAN FRANCISCO -- Apple's legendary reality distortion field couldn't protect its new iPad from the sanitary napkin jokes."
-------------------------
Ouch.
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"Apple's i Pad Name Not the First Choice for Women. Period."
http://www.fastcompany.com/blog/alissa-walker/designerati/apple-ipad-name-not-winning-women
"Is it that time of the month again?"
"It sounds like a sanitary napkin."
"Will the next version have wings?"
"Of all the names that Apple had reportedly secured--Apple Tablet, iTablet, Magic Slate, iSlate--I think it's safe to say that no one truly believed that Apple would name their newest product the iPad. Especially women."
"So will the 64GB one be called the Maxi-Pad?"
"I'm holding out for the iRag."
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CNET
http://news.cnet.com/8301-13577_3-10442732-36.html
"Instant i Pad reactions: Whoa, awkward name
Who needs opinion columnists when you have Twitter? Once the hub of micro-punditry recovered from a molasses-like slowdown amid chatter surrounding the launch of Apple's iPad, it became clear that the Twittering masses had a thing or two to say to Steve Jobs about his pretty new gadget. And it wasn't all nice."
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--------------------------The Seattle Times….
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/businesstechnology/2010920987_apusipadwhatsinaname.html?prmid=obnetwork
"Shiny gadget, icky name: i Pad jokes fly on Web
You have to wonder whether there were any women in the room when the marketing geniuses at Apple decided to call the company's new gadget the "iPad." Because the jokes about feminine hygiene products are flying."
____________________________
Stevie….Did you get a package in the mail that looked like some rainbow colored windows and in it there was a package that said "Eat me" and you did?
You can tell me.
And after that did you name your gizmo that name? Because I think that Bill Gates just put some saltpeter in your food buddy and you've gone all feminista.
It will be okay buddy…We'll try to fix this, we will……There, there- there, there.
You could have called it "The Information Station" and it would have gotten less grief.
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~ Est queadam fiere voluptas.There is a certain pleasure in weeping. (Ovid) This certainly applies here I'm sure..... ~
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