Sunday, December 21, 2008

Just a short Snopes this week....



It's all true.
http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/medical/garman.asp

I don't know how to describe this other than the heading:
Courier Parcel Scam....It pretty much describes it.
http://www.snopes.com/fraud/phishing/courier.asp

It's true...Mostly...now go out and bring forth havoc and pain to the other team....
http://www.snopes.com/sports/hockey/blackhawks.asp

Don't mess with the man in red.
http://www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/santa/philadelphia.asp

Strangely they don't mention that this kind of email would lead to some kind of massive lawsuit...So, um....hua.
http://www.snopes.com/politics/business/layoff.asp

Christmas Superstitions....Say it ain't so....
http://www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/superstitions.asp

Something happened on the way to the stable...
http://www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/humor/innkeeper.asp

Lock and unload
http://www.snopes.com/autos/techno/lockcode.asp


Ben Stein speaks up about Christmas and the happiness therein...And tells everyone to basically "Get over yourselves already."
http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/confessions.asp

Saturday, December 20, 2008

....Hey someone polish my lack luster feelings....

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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~ Okay can it be spring yet?~

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Adorable freaky Christmas dog:



and this is just creepy:



Rudolph is the Red Nosed Reindeer...




Well, he and the Pope...

Only in Northern Michigan



* I wonder if this is the same dude that previously was crashing his truck into things?


TRUCK CRASHES INTO TOUR BUS IN OTSEGO COUNTY
Police believe alcohol played a role in an Otsego County crash involving a
bus.  It happened around 8:30 last night on M-32 west of Gaylord when the
driver of a pick up truck lost control and swerved into the path of an
oncoming tour bus.  The pick up truck was T-boned by the bus.  Two people
from the bus were hurt, but will be okay.  The truck driver went to the
hospital, from there deputies took him to jail.  He's accused of driving
while intoxicated and driving with a suspended license.



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* See previous entry of the insanity that is Northern Michigan truck drivers crashing into various things.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

SNOPES and FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!


And FROM THE DESK OF PETE YATES!
Because it's always funny when it's not you....



Because we embrace the hateful nature of nature.



And because....Well, sometimes reporters are not the brightest lightblub in the tanning bed.




________________________________________________________


Be afraid, be very afraid.

It looks at you, it knows you live there....

He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when your awake, he knows if you've been bad or good....So does that make Santa some kind of voyeuristic stalker?



Thursday, December 11, 2008

The cat that stole Christmas....



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~Snow is pretty, unless you're the one who needs to get somewhere and has to shovel it....Then it's just "that white garbage that falls from the sky"....~

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Flavored with Onion....


Supreme Court Overturns Bush v. Gore

December 9, 2008 | Issue 44•50


WASHINGTON—In an unexpected judicial turnaround, the Supreme Court this week reversed its 2000 ruling in the landmark case of Bush v. Gore, stripping George W. Bush of his earlier political victory, and declaring Albert Arnold Gore the 43rd president of the United States of America.

Enlarge Image Gore

President Gore, retroactively determined by the Supreme Court to be the winner of the 2000 election, is sworn in for his six-week term.

The court, which called its original decision to halt manual recounts in Florida "a ruling made in haste," voted unanimously on Wednesday in favor of the 2000 Democratic nominee.

Gore will serve as commander in chief from Dec. 10 to Jan. 20.

"Allowing this flaw in judgment to stand would set an unworkable precedent for future elections and cause irreparable harm to the impartiality of this court," said Chief Justice John G. Roberts in his majority opinion. "Furthermore, let me be the first to personally congratulate President Gore on his remarkable come-from-behind victory. May he guide us wisely into this new millennium."

Enlarge Image Bush

Former Texas Rangers owner George W. Bush gets some much-needed rest Monday after his 2000 presidential campaign loss to rival Al Gore.

Added Roberts, "The system works."

Moments after the court's noontime announcement, Gore was flown to Washington, D.C. aboard Air Force One, sworn in on the steps of the U.S. Capitol, and immediately escorted to a brief victory rally at the National Mall. By 4:30 p.m., his 15 cabinet appointees had been vetted, contacted, and brought to Washington, where they were all simultaneously approved by a majority vote in the Senate.

Gore then delivered the first of seven consecutive State of the Union addresses.

Shortly after being notified of the court's historic decision, a gracious George W. Bush appeared at a press conference with four hastily packed suitcases to congratulate his 2000 opponent on the decisive victory.

"Al Gore has fought a strong and patient campaign, and he has prevailed," said the former Republican candidate and Texas governor. "I wish him nothing but the best, and hope that his leadership will help see this nation through a catastrophic recession, an unending war in Iraq, and the single largest housing crisis in history. Congratulations, Mr. President."

In his first and last 42 days as president, Gore will reportedly visit U.S. troops overseas, meet with dignitaries from France, Great Britain, China, Azerbaijan, Japan, and Eastern Europe, formalize a plan to bail out the struggling airline and automotive industries, sign the Kyoto Protocol, take a photo of himself and wife Tipper in front of the White House Christmas tree, and ensure a smooth transition between his own administration to that of incoming president-elect Barack Obama.

"Great humility, honor, I'm President," Gore said to a crowd of tourists hastily shuffled into a White House corridor to hear the president deliver his acceptance speech. "Thanks, bye."

According to political analysts, the road ahead for President Gore is not an easy one. During his first conference call with House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, NATO, OPEC, and the United Nations, Gore admitted that making good on his campaign promises in the next six to eight weeks might be difficult. The president noted his pledge to provide affordable health care to every single child in the U.S. by 2004 as "specifically in need of possible amending."

Gore also withdrew his intentions to pay off the national debt by 2012.

Although the president has already instituted a number of impressive environmental initiatives, he has drawn criticism from Republicans who claim that he is completely unprepared to deal with the current national climate.

"Throughout the entirety of his 2000 campaign, never once did Gore mention the tragedy of 9/11, or our conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan," Sen. Arlen Specter (R-PA) said. "Does he not care about our national security? Does Al Gore plan to ignore the needs of our brave men and women on the ground? What kind of world does Al Gore think we still live in?"

President Gore will not be the only new arrival in the White House to face criticism, however. Joseph Lieberman—the former independent senator from Connecticut who in just two months has gone from the short list of possible Republican running mates to nearly being ousted from the Democratic Caucus to becoming the first Jewish Vice President—will also have much to answer for.

"Uhh," Lieberman said in his first official address Wednesday. "Umm…yeah."

Bush Tours America To Survey Damage Caused By His Disastrous Presidency July 2, 2008
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It's Okay, I'm Attractive

By Anne Macais
December 10, 2008 | Issue 44•50

Anne Macais

No need to worry, I'm here now.

I realize you may have had some concerns before as to whether I should be given my way, but please, let me set your mind at ease about all that: I'm attractive. Matter resolved. And furthermore, as you can all clearly see, I'm very pretty and have appealing features, so everything is going to be all right.

Don't fret. My physical appearance is beautiful to look at.

No prob—I'm hot. It's natural to question why I should be promoted, admitted to the club, given that expensive necklace, allowed to use your car whenever I want, and able to expect that someone else will always pick up the check, but that's all settled now because I'm beautiful. And since I am advantaged, physically, there's no reason I shouldn't be given free rein to do what I will in this, or any other, situation. I'm sexy. That ought to take care of any adversity, trouble, or potential slight inconvenience, to me, that might come up.

Just wanted to clear that up so we can move along and get on with the me-admiring while I go about doing whatever I want. I am attractive. You are attracted to me because of this attractiveness.

My face is symmetrical. Therefore, the situation is completely resolved. My voice is melodious and, when not utterly aloof, slightly flirtatious. My posture, walk, and way of slowly shifting my weight from one hip to the other while twirling my hair absentmindedly as I gaze off into an untroubled haze are all compelling as hell to ruminate upon, in silent contemplation, while the rest of the world pauses. I even smell great. You're in for a rare treat, sensory-input-wise, being around me.

Go ahead. Soak it in. Feast your eyes. This is one of those moments. For you. So you see, we have no cause for distress anymore, in terms of whatever that may have been that was temporarily impeding the immediate gratification of my every wish.

I have shiny hair, so I'll handle this. My skin is flawless and free of blemish—save for one alluring birthmark seductively situated below my honey-dappled hip. Every part of my being is so alluring and attractive that it would be unfair to ask you to choose what you like the best. Well, no matter. You'll never suffer the hardship of having to pick a favorite from among my perfect features, because soon I will vanish—like a gossamer strand of spider-silk whisked away in the whispering wind—with no obligation to you or anyone like you.

Allow me.

And you will, in all likelihood, never speak to me again. Because, come on, what are the chances? But in the meantime, I am here, see? And you are looking at me. It's nice. Nice. Nice.

There, there. I'm gorgeous.

It seemed like there was some sort of problem? A moment ago? I'm sure everything is okay now and all issues have been resolved in my favor. I have a perfect set of gleaming white teeth, behind full, ruby-red, kissable lips that you will never kiss. My bone structure is genetically hardwired to be pleasing to the eye. My giggle is adorable! Everything's taken care of, okay? Because I'm pretty.

See? All better now. All is well. All is as it should be, thanks to my being incredibly good-looking. My legs look good. My eyes look good. My neck—let's not even go into my amazing, statuesque neck, which no one can help wanting to wrap their arms around and nuzzle their face into because of its inherently attractive nature. All of me looks good. And you—lucky, lucky you—get to bask in it, for a second or two, so its all good. We're good. We're cool, you and I.

There exists, in this zone of physical space surrounding my physical person, a state of grace suspending all potential impediments to my satisfaction in a low, murmuring sea of preference that flows from you toward me, because of my ageless and elegant beauty. So there is no tension or anxiety—not here anyway, at least not until I leave, which I inevitably will—and in the meantime you can savor my temporary sojourn amongst you.

Behold! My radiance is gently glowing like the soft light of the moon, drawing awe and admiration from everything it casts its light on. I'm paying attention to you. Yes, to little, less-attractive you. Doesn't that feel good, knowing that I am not only in the same room as you, but that I'm also acknowledging your existence momentarily? I'll bet it feels great. After all, this sort of thing doesn't happen to you every day. So what say we settle the pesky little matter of you not bowing to my every whim?

Pretty please?


_

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

'Bard' Captivates Potter Fans

J.K. Rowling's first post–Harry Potter book, The Tales Of Beedle The Bard, has become another bestseller for the author. What do you think?

Old Man

Noel Hildebrant,
Cashier
"I'd like to see her write about something other than wizards and warlocks. Maybe elves."

Young Woman

Angela Sabatke,
Unemployed
"I know, I've already read it! I thought the last tale, 'Lustoc The Mage Capitalizes On A Cultural Phenomenon,' was fantastic."

Asian Man

Wayne Kokkinos,
Floor Supervisor
"Who cares about dumb wizards now? Twilight! Twilight! Twilight! Vampires! Vampires! Vampires!"

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Only in Northern Michigan



I want to rent one to shovel snow and then just hang out and eat cookies and watch television and complain that there isn't anything to do; then slurk off to the basement and play on the computer....
That way I'll feel all nostalgic.

RENT-A-KID PROGRAM RAISING MONEY FOR CADILLAC MARCHING BAND
As part of a Cadillac school fundraiser, you can rent your very own errand
runner or snow shoveler.  On Monday kids in the Cadillac High School
Marching Band were hoping to raise money with their Rent-A-Kid program.
It's a fundraiser the Band Boosters are holding to get the students to a
performance in Florida after the new year.  They're offering chores like
baby-sitting, grocery shopping, and even shoveling snow, all for a
donation.  If you're interested in having chores done around your house,
you can call the Cadillac High School Band Department for more
information.

....And apparently....


Weather:  Winter Storm Ongoing


Thursday, December 4, 2008

Almost on some kind of Fox Reality show



CLOSE CALL FOR ANTRIM COUNTY OFFICER
The oncoming storm is sure to bring more slippery roads, and a close call
for one Antrim County officer serves as serious reminder to take it slow.
The deputy was helping another driver when someone smashed into his car.
He was on the scene of an accident on Cherry Avenue in Milton Township
when it  happened.  Deputy Kevin Holk says he was standing at his trunk,
his back to the road when his partner yelled for him to watch out.  The
deputy says he dove into a snow embankment just in the nick of time.
Michigan State Police handled the crash and cited the out of control
driver.


Monday, December 1, 2008

Only in Northern Michigan




DRIVER ARRESTED AFTER POLICE CHASE IN CADILLAC
Cadillac troopers say a man with 12 convictions for drunk driving led them
on a short chase through town early this morning. A gas station clerk
called to tell police that a man had just left in his pick up truck, and
was very intoxicated. Police saw the truck driving down Mitchell Street
without it's lights on. Troopers tried to pull the man over, but he kept
going. After about four blocks, the man pulled into a parking lot and
then rammed a patrol car
. The driver was arrested and will be arraigned
today.

*Ya, think?*

Ten top gifts we don't want .....Really.

Marie ClaireHey, I'll bet that Marilyn Manson would die for this!

COFFIN COUCH, $3,500.

Who wants to be reminded of their own mortality while vegging on the couch watching Six Feet Under?

___________________________
Marie Claire
 

POO-POURRI, $24.95.

"Spritz the bowl before you go, and no one else will ever know," urge the makers of Poo-Pourri, an all-natural essential oil spray for the loo that claims to trap "embarrassing odors." What's more embarrassing--a little bathroom odor or having this sitting on the sink?

___________________________

Wasn't this in a Batman movie?

Marie Claire
 

BESTOW WALL-MOUNTED HAND VASE, $95.

We love getting flowers as much as the next girl, but we'll take a traditional vase over this eternally-outstretched hand.

_______________________________
Wasn't this the reason Martin Luther nailed 95 thesis's to the door of a church?
Marie Claire

TICKET TO HEAVEN, $12.79.

These tickets are for the trip of a lifetime--heaven. They come complete with a handy travel kit that includes a certificate of your reservation, the Official Heaven Identification Card, and a Heaven 101 informational guide. We wonder what their returns & exchanges policy is.

___________________________

....And apparently we don't want to visit Marie Claire because that is on the 11th page...Making it the worst gift in the world.

10 Gifts We Don't Want

marie claire


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In other news....Guess what? We're in a recession! Who knew?

Caption of the moment

By Dirigo:


Meanwhile, in the Gulf of Mexico...

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