Thanksgiving Onions

'L.A. Law' Wikipedia Page Viewed 874 Times Today 11.24.10

SAN FRANCISCO—According to an analysis of IP addresses and Internet traffic statistics, the Wikipedia page for the 1980s-era NBC legal drama L.A. Law has been viewed a total of 874 times today.

Group That Makes Dodge Truck Commercials Called 'Creative Team'

George W. Bush Forgets To Mention 9/11 In Memoir

St. Louis Rated Most Dangerous City

'Well, it is such a depressing, pessimistic city, what with that gigantic frown monument they have there.'

Obama Outlines Moral, Philosophical Justifications For Turkey Pardon

President Obama announces plans to deliver a two-hour speech explaining his reasons for granting clemency to Cranberry, the Thanksgiving turkey.

Mom, Jeremy Won't Let Me Create An Atmosphere Of Sustained Menace

by Daniel Gellman

He's doing it again, Mom. Mom! Jeremy's doing it again. Tell him to stop! I'm serious. All I'm trying to do is cultivate and maintain an atmosphere of sustained menace, and he won't let me.

Just because everyone should at least once see an anime character in concert in front of some really different fans.
I'm telling you, if it's weird, digital, or mathematically inclined... it just might be Japanese.

Thanks for Giving

Okay, here's my thing...You might be broke this week. But, you have food. You might be lonely right now and dreading your family feast on Thursday, but at least you have family. You might not like where you are living sometimes,but there is a roof over your head. Go out now and take some food to a soup kitchen,volunteer there if you're alone- go to a food pantry with a load of canned food and toiletries. Set aside your pocket change and load it in your pockets for bell ringers when you shop. You're blessed. Act like it. Give back and give thanks! Happy Thanksgiving!
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Glad Tidings of Turkey Day....

Oh why the hell not?!?

http://www.snopes.com/holidays/thanksgiving/hotline.asp

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Only in Michigan

Drug toss gets mom, son busted
Another attempt to lob contraband over the prison walls in St. Louis resulted in two arrests with more to follow. Read More

Students banned from CMU library for toy guns
Three Central Michigan University students were banned from the Charles V. Park Library Thursday after going into a meeting room with what appeared... Read More

Only in Michigan and other toxic waste sites....

They're waiting for Binky the Three-eyed Fish to weigh in on the matter....

St. Louis cleanup review delayed again
The group of people from the Environmental Protection Agency in Washington, D.C., who will decide on the cleanup of the Velsicol plant site is called... Read More

Onion spices up things.....

Row Of Asterisks Spices Up Otherwise Ordinary E-Mail

The Four Seasons Of Smoove

Okay-Looking Guy Meets Kind-Of-Pretty Girl

'Not Quite Perfect' McDonald's Opens In Illinois Outlet Mall

94 year old with a gun

http://www.themorningsun.com/articles/2010/11/16/news/doc4ce19ef118fdc461840855.txt. 94-year-old bags eight-pointer on Opening DayVincent Brown, a 94-year-old retired dentist from Mt. Pleasant, shot an eight-point buck before noon Monday, the opening day of firearm deer hunting... GAH!
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Snopes, Only in Northern Michigan and of course more Onions.

Snopes
Teacher imparts a lesson in the value of freedom by having veterans return her students' desks.
Does Best Buy charge a 15% restocking fee on returned merchandise?
Prayers are requested for the Darkhorse Marine battalion fighting in Afghanistan.
A damaged saguaro cactus killed the man who harmed it by falling on him.

_________Only in Northern Michigan___________________
A taste for the exotic
It used to be, pork was the other white meat. Read More

Please don't scare me.

________________Onion ____________________________________

Report: Global Warming Issue From 2 Or 3 Years Ago May Still Be Problem 11.10.10

WASHINGTON—According to a report released this week by the Center for Global Development, climate change, the popular mid-2000s issue that raised awareness of the fact that the earth's continuous rise in temperature will have catastrophic ecological effects, has apparently not been resolved, and may still be a problem.

Nation Waist-Deep In Soybeans After $30 Trillion Farm Subsidy Bill Accidentally Passed

Local Man Foremost Expert On What The Terrorists Should Do If They Really Want To Hurt Us

Joad Cressbeckler Fears Genetic Modification Causes 'Wrath-Minded Taters'

If I Had One Piece Of Advice For Today's Youth, It Would Be To Throw A Baseball Really, Really Well

Magical Girlfriend Transmutes Guilt Into Precious Stones

'Not Quite Perfect' McDonald's Opens In Illinois Outlet Mall

Only in Northern Michigan -movie review, and "In Memoriam".

Isabella County. gas prices remain high
http://www.themorningsun.com/articles/2010/11/14/business/srv0000009946229.txt.
Really?
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Skyline.
http://movieexpertblog.com/skyline-review-and-synopsis-11293.html
..........Is stupid....And confusing...
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In Memorial:

Inky
April 2002-Nov. 4, 2010
She came, she purred, she conquered. We will miss you little girl. She was an ebony beauty.
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Only in Northern Michigan

• COMMENTARY: Will things get better in Lansing?

No probably not.

• Write your lawmakers a letter!

Nothing I haven't done before.

Police plan extra patrols for Western Weekend
When the Western Michigan Broncos come to Mt. Pleasant for Friday night's football game with Central Michigan University, area police agencies..

Cha!?!

Federal agents raid pharmacies (36)
No Midol?

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Onion bastards

Last Remaining Politician Must Rebuild Entire Government Following Bloodiest Midterm Election In American History 11.03.10

WASHINGTON—In the wake of what is being called the deadliest midterm election in the nation's history, Washington's sole surviving politician, Rep. Peter DeFazio of Oregon's 4th Congressional District, emerged from the rubble of the Capitol building Wednesday to announce his intention to rebuild the fallen U.S. government.

Kim Jong-Un Privately Doubting He's Crazy Enough To Run North Korea

Nonvoter Knew It Would Turn Out This Way

Americans Bravely Go To Polls Despite Threat Of Electing Congress

Social Security Scam Robs Elderly By Convincing Them They Are Dead

A new scam preys on the elderly by informing them they have died and instructing them to reroute their social security checks to the 'Department of the Dead.'

This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Guns Around The House

by Jessica Postma

Okay, that is it. Timothy, Rebecca, come here this instant! I've simply had it with you two. I thought I heard a .357 Magnum round discharge, and sure enough, what do I find when I open the end-table drawer but your father's still-smoking Desert Eagle.

New Poll Finds 86 Percent Of Americans Don't Want To Have A Country Anymore